Wednesday, February 21, 2018

Clearing out our shed. Getting rid of so much. Hard, but necessary because of the move...

Two weeks ago on a bitterly cold, but semi sunny day. Noboru and I went out in the backyard and decluttered the shed. Absolutely 100% necessary. But also honestly....a little bit emotionally hard for me. I get attached to things. Granted I go through the shed once a year and I am by *no* means a hoarder. I have absolutely no qualms at all... to purge stuff....getting rid of unneeded no longer useful to us... stuff that we'll never use again, is not a problem for me. But yeah...I'm also human. And on certain things...I do have a hard time getting rid of a certain item or two. The inflatable pools. I have 1 that my kids used as toddlers. My kids haven't been toddlers in forever...but I held on to that. And then I bought a much bigger deeper pool. This one pictured. And was nice to fill it with iced cold water on a hot summers day and even though my kids didn't swim in it any longer...they would sit in it and cool off...I would do that too. So...I always kept it. But again...with our move in April. It was sadly time to get rid of both pools. And no selling a used pool.....would be more trouble than it would be worth. The shipping would cost the buyer of my said pool...the shipping would be too much. They'd be better off buying a pool from their local DIY. Pools are heavy. And since I asked everyone I knew close by...if they needed they didn't. So we tossed it.  
A big bag of water guns. the mama, I recall where I bought each and every one of these water guns. Either Trial or Cainz. : ) How water guns and our big backyard was always something my 2 boys would love to play with each and every summer. And frankly speaking, who would want to buy a used water gun....when you could buy one at your local DIY store for less than 500 yen. So again...something we just tossed. 

Dryer rack/holder that attached to my old washing machine. I am using my same dryer...but since my washing machine changed last August or September I needed a new dryer holder. So this old dryer holder... had to be tossed. I felt no sadness about seeing a rack that held my dryer go. This stroller on the other hand. My lovely beloved stroller. Was honestly *the hardest thing* I had to part with. This was the item that nearly killed me. Emotionally. For starters, I did have one of those gigantic strollers in America when Branden was born, the kind that hold their baby seats. But in Japan that was so outrageously was ridiculous to use in Japan. When I went back to Denver for 6 weeks when B was just a toddler, 2 and a half or so in age. I went to Babies R US and found this one. It was called the Graco Citi Lite. No, not City Light, lol. It was black and royal beautiful blue. Not that rank off color Thomas the Tank Engine is, sorry Thomas. But a vibrant bright blue. This stroller was so slim and light, it opened with just 1 hand. Japanese strollers I looked into... but their baskets were so super teeny tiny and harder than hell to open. This Graco Citi Lite was the best. As slim as a Japanese stroller, bigger wheels/tires and a way bigger basket. You could open it with 1 hand. Skinny enough for Japanese supermarket aisles. Big basket to hold a bunch of stuff and it was like $80 US. I used this on Branden until he didn't need a stroller anymore. I also used this on Noah his entire baby life and toddler life. When I think how many times this stroller went to Tokyo Disney Sea. Tokyo Disneyland. How many times this stroller flew to Guam. Or strolled my kids around Hakone or USJ. How many times this stroller flew to Saipan (twice) how this stroller flew to Seoul South Korea once and carried a 1 year old Noah all around when the 4 of us were on vacation. How this stroller went to New York. Knotts Berry Farm in California. San Francisco. Minnesota about 25 times. PDX...Sea-tac. This stroller has carried my most precious things in the world to me. It carried my baby's. My sons who I love and adore. When I think about how many times I took the stroller cloth off and washed it. How I had those snazzy bag holder things on the back of my stroller (just a few bucks)...thank you Japan for selling those amazing bag holders for strollers (are those even available in the US?). How I attached little toys on the front of said stroller so my kids would have something to play with, while they were out and about. So for all in intensive purposes.... this stroller carried my most precious cargo. My children. And yep..while I could give my kids out-grown clothes away to friends. I could *never* give their stroller away. I respected this stroller too much. Just so much history, so many memories associated with this stroller. Maybe you're reading this and you'll "get this" and maybe you won't. Either way is okay. But...yes for all these long years...the one thing I could never get rid of...was my stroller. Out of respect or maybe emotional attachment or both. Until 2 weeks ago. For me...the hardest thing to throw? Hands down my stroller. It wasn't the cost or value. It was the emotional attachment. That stroller was *always* with me. Just always. How could I throw it away? Until then...I never could. 

No more undokais/sports days. So no more need for a table and chair combo. Again...didn't feel sad about this. 

Good bye to all our outside Christmas lights. The Christmas lights that lit up outside our house every single Christmas season. How cars would pass our house....because this is the inaka and not many houses are lit up in our town. And so yeah...people/families would drive past and see the warm happy house... all nicely lit up American style. And these were a pinch sad for me... to see us throw these away. But...I did remind myself that....after Noboru moves to the U.S. We will get another house and decorate again. So..the lights were about a 2 out of 10 for me on the sad scale. The swimming pools were about a 3 out of 10. The stroller was about a 20 out of 10, for me. Anyways...I know these lights will not be the last. So...with that in mind...I could let the lights go. However...I know...that stroller would be the last for me. The last stroller as a mama...I would ever own. And so...the stroller for me was freaking beyond hard. Two bikes also went. Again...auctions online...we saw bikes for sale for 500 yen and even then ...people were not buying them! Plus shipping...would not be worth for a buyer or for us to sell. In America we have many Good Will or Salvation Army type places. We have garage sales too. But that really isn't the type of country I'm in. So...and I can't just stay in Japan... until I sell a bike for 500 yen either...that's not logical either. At some point you gotta cut it as a loss... and move on. You can't move forward, if you're stuck in the damn past. 

Trash day. All our stuff carted away to the trash spot. I dropped off Branden at 6:20am and I saw our beloved items and it sorta hurt. Logically I know it *must* be done. I came home. Made sure Noah got his packed lunch and homework and whatnot. Put Noah in the car... drove past our stuff yet again. I looked at the stuff. And on the way coming home, I stopped for about 30 seconds and snapped this picture. Just for my own memories sake. 1% of me wanted to drag my stroller back home and into the shed. But then... I had to snap myself out of it. But by the same token.... You have a lifetime of memories staring you in the face. You remember every squeal and splash that your child splashed in that pool. You remember how your child zoomed off on that bike and the smile on their face. Or how they chased each other and shot each other with their water guns. How many undokai obentos my family enjoyed on that table. Was it a little hard to say good bye to our stuff that day? Of course...I'm not a robot. I'm a living and breathing human being with feelings. It hurt... to say good bye to the stuff.

But I know...3 years from now. We're going to be *so* completely settled in our lives in America. And I'm going to come back to my blog and read how sad that I was... to say good bye to this stuff. And I'm going to laugh at myself for it. So maybe...for today. This post is for me. : ) And for you too. Like I will get to see. The easy parts of moving away and letting go and the hard parts too. That day...was a hard part of letting go. Onwards and upwards. : ) Thanks for taking this journey with me, you guys. : ) 

Anyways...any new news? It's snowing here today. But it's the kind that melts when it hits the ground. But it's gray skies and bitterly cold outside right now. My hair appointment is tomorrow as you know. Starts at 9 or 9:30am. Should be there all day long. : ( It'll be worth it in the end.